Vote for me & Help me get a Scholarship!

Ive been selected as one top 10 finalists for the The Blogging Scholarship!  (Cheese!) I totally need your support in the next 5 days – come vote for me! Winners will be annouced Nov 6th and its $5000.00!!! I SO need this!

- It will only take a few clicks! so VOTE HERE!!!

- You can only vote once from your IP address

- If you have time – please leave a comment about me and my work on the voting page so folks see your support!

- Please tell your friends to support!

- You will go to heaven (or afterlife place of choice) for your love a grad student

- Here are the other contestant blogs . Some amazing work. All of us are different and everyone is strong.

Ya’ll know I’m in grad school, tryin to finish up my work, trying to balance all of the work I do – writing, theatre production, research, speaking, workshops, all my multi-media projects, teaching and support of my students! I could SO use this funding to assist me this semester!! I’m broke and always at the end of semesters its a struggle to pay bills, eat and get simple things like toilet paper!!!

Thanks for voting for me!!!

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If you care – Here’s what I wrote for my application:

I began “A Birth Project” over a year ago with specific goals. As it reads on my blog, “This blog began with a two-pronged focus: One – my personal search for my birth parents and Two – as a place to consider my experiences as a Black girl adopted by white parents, or ‘my life as a TRA’”  (transracial adoptee).

I had no idea that my writing would connect me with a powerful group of transracial adoptees, adoption activists, scholars and performers. This connection became central to how the blog evolved. I post and comment on current news stories, post my own struggles continuing to let the world see my own search and reunion process as I find ‘parts of me’ that I never knew existed.

The most profound impact the blog/blogosphere has had on me is first, I have found support from an online community of transracial adoptees from all races and cultural backgrounds. Women and men from across the globe have written me personal, painful emails, thanking me for being vocal about my experiences and have given me love for saying things they always felt, but either were afraid to speak or could not articulate. Second, I was inspired to create an international non-profit organization “Adult Adoptees of the African Diaspora”. AAAD brings together adult adoptees of African descent across the globe and provide support, research and outreach for this widespread population. We hope our voices add to the strong voices of Korean, Chinese and Vietnamese transracial and international adoptees. Many TRA’s are isolated, the only person of color for miles, forced to struggle against uneducated assumptions about skin color or culture. This organization provides comfort and strength to a TRA who may be alone in her or his town. I hope my blog continues to do the same.

Stone

 

her thighs

sore with memory

shift back and forth as she walks

uphill toward the train

she is all tears and fog

left alone to soon

captured by ten years of

photographs transformed to

what now looks like regret

 

her body has been an earthquake shift

tectonic plates sliding out of place

revealing hidden earth, graves and bodies

 

she walks crooked

asphalt under her cracked now

like the day she is about to encounter

loss stinging her cheeks

like the fog in the air

 

she is demented metal

sidewalk trash fury

on the side of skyscrapers

ill-fitting and torn

 

the train is coming

breeze sucking air from tunnels

she stands spine tall to keep her

chest from caving in

hollow from giving voice

to echoes, ghosts

and orange desire.

My First Review! Yay!

Check out my first review in the Berkeley Daily Planet!

I think one of the interesting things about my solo show is the title. “Ungrateful Daughter” seems to be a sharp-edged title in the way that it grabs people’s attention – what does she mean? I think that most of my reasonings for choosing this title are connected to the discourses that surround adoption and loyalty to family. In most popular cultural imaginations of the way that adoptees should be responding to adoption is indeed either a “one or the other” response. So many of us adult adoptees have talked about our resistence to this “grateful/successful” vs. “ungrateful/failure” binary already that I wont go into it again here, but this dialouge is really what this title attempts to speak to, the complexity of this experience.

In this review, Kassof mentions me being “disenchanted” – its an interesting word. I dont know if I even was “enchanted” with being adopted or being the only black person in a white world. I think another word might be ‘critical’, which is something I think many white parents are unprepared for when their child grows up to understand the world in a particular way, and begin to respond to them in a particular way because of this understanding.

Overall – Its cool to get a review. I love that she was willing to take the chance to come to the show. I like that she was disturbed. That means I did something right. Cool. 

I want to thank my director, my workshop mates, my friends, countrymen… and my TRA familia. lol…. you like me.. you really like me! 

:)  

They Just Dont Know

but imma tell them.

I’m on my way out the house to the airport to pick up my homeboy comin in from IL for the American Studies Conference. Im late already, but my mailbox is full. My copy of “Outsiders Within” has arrived. Im so excited I put down my bag and right on the porch, open the copy and read the dedication. Its to me. To you. To us.

I am in tears on my front porch so overwhelmed I cant stop them. This is why I write. Why I speak, why I perform. Im so tired of someone telling me who and what I am.

thank you. thank you. thank you.

(P.S.  I expect updates from all of you at the conference in NY!!! Im sending love and I wanted to come, but was already committed to ASA Conference!)