Maybe she doesnt want to be found

On days like today, i think, what if my birth mother doesnt want to be found? I'm on about 5 different lists for searchers and birth mothers, have spent extensive time on the internet, loggin hours and hours searching for details. I watch other birth mothers and adoptees be found over and over again and it still doesnt happen to me.

days like today. i think, what if she doesnt want me to find her? what if i would be ruining the life she has created for herself? but then, what does that make me?


3 thoughts on “Maybe she doesnt want to be found

  1. This is what happened to my friend. Found the birth family and the mother refused to meet but she did meet all her half siblings. Biological mother had an affair and she was the result. Half siblings became very intrusive. Since they were her “real” family she should spend time and holidays etc. with them. She had to tell them to back off and after many months terminated contact. Biological mother never agreed to meet. Friend wishes she never would have bothered.

  2. thank you for this post. yes i have thought about what happens if I have a “bad” reunion. My ex also had a strange reunion with his birth parents, where his mother got very possessive and it drove him crazy. I’ve thought about all of these things, but it doesnt change the wanting to know. :)–>

  3. “what will it make me”. It will make you the same person you are today.Suppose she never contacts you, never wants to contact you or perhaps she’s no longer alive.That doesn’t change who you are. You are still the same wonderful you that have always been.

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